Fashion Feeling: Perspective Changes Things

You know how often times people say: “Perspective is everything”? or something to that effect?  It’s a common piece of advice that’s given out freely, usually when someone is struggling with an area of their lives.  I was thinking about this recently while listening to someone talk about a struggle they were dealing with in their current situation.  Perspective is an interesting thing isn’t it?  When you think about it, you could put two people in the same situation, and they can come out describing that situation completely differently.  In that way, perspective is everything.  However, I sometimes get the feeling that when I’m being told this piece of advice, it means that I shouldn’t be looking forward or striving for greater things.  Let me explain.

I’d like to propose a change to this quote.  I would like to say: “perspective CHANGES everything.”  That one little word, to me, is everything!  I completely believe that having the correct perspective is incredibly important, and quite honestly, can be everything in determining your future.  But I don’t think we should just change our perspective on our situation, then sit still.  Say you hate your job.  It’s not what you were made for, it drains the life out of you, and it’s basically something you do just to survive.  Those are valid feelings, and nowhere in the world should anyone say: “you should just learn to love it and stick with it forever!” because that’s not always the truth!  However, you could flip it around and say: “I’m so grateful that I can make a living right now, while I pursue what other things/jobs I can do that bring me more fulfillment than this job right now.”  I think if we can use our perspective to help propel us forward, we can do a lot of amazing things.  So I guess what I’m saying, is that I agree with the statement: “perspective is everything” AS LONG AS we don’t use it to basically tell ourselves that we are stuck and we may as well make the best of it.  Which, sure, there are seasons in life that are very much like that.  I understand.  I’ve been there.  But the good news is, seasons don’t last forever, we can ALWAYS learn new skills, and the better perspective we have on where we are and where we can go next, the more likely we are to go places!  Perspective on where we are, WHO we are, and what we are capable of CHANGES EVERYTHING.

I’ve had this shirt from Anthropologie for years now.  I love it, but I never wear it anymore.  I bought it right after having my second baby and it was literally the magic shirt that made me look thinner when I was most definitely NOT.  It’s one of those shirts that I would have bought no matter what, but because I wore it when I wasn’t feeling all that thin, I have a hard time wearing it now that I’ve lost more weight.  If you’ve ever gone through dramatic weight loss or had a baby you know those pieces I’m talking about!  So the other day, I was looking at the shirt and thought, what if I looked at it differently.  What if I wore it BACKWARDS?  And voila.  My perspective changed!

The bralette is the magic piece for backless tops because it adds a little pizazz!  Mine is Free People.  This top is old, but here’s a similar one if you want to try this out!  The jeans are vintage Levi’s and the shoes are vintage loafers (if you don’t have loafers, get some!!)  My necklace is from the fabulous Free To Wander on Etsy.

I wish changing my perspective on life was as easy as putting my shirt on differently.  But we all gotta start somewhere and just do our best!
Katy

On Jealousy and Fringe

Jealousy.  It’s one of those feelings that we all come across at one point or another.  And is it just me, or has social media managed to feed the green-eyed monster and somehow made it…bigger and more accessible?  It’s kind of the worst, yuckiest feeling, and yet…it still happens whether we like it or not.  Today, I had a run in with the not-so-lovely feeling.

I was out and about, and I saw someone who I actually do not know personally.  At all.  But thanks to the magic of social media, I know quite a bit about her.  At least, what she chooses to share that is (I feel like that always needs to be clarified, right?).  So I saw her, and because I “know so much about her”, I found myself feeling jealous.  Before I knew it, I was thinking things like: “wow it must be nice to be her…to have so much money…to be able to do and buy whatever she wants…” I mean, it took all of 3.5 seconds for my thoughts to escalate to this point where I was feeling angry with her.  What on earth??  I was so repulsed by my thoughts and feelings…and yet I still had them.  I really know NOTHING about her as a person.  And yet, for 3.5 seconds, I was kinda sorta actively hating her.  Wow.  I’ve found that it’s gotten easier and easier for me to forgive people for being judgmental and mean at times because, hi, my name is Katy, and I sometimes have judgmental and mean thoughts.  Yep.  I’m no better than anyone else.  My world has been rocked, yet again!

So in the moment I was jealous of this poor girl who had no idea I was directing laser beam thoughts of hate at her, I didn’t think for a second about who she was, what her life is/has been like, or what she’s been through.  I have no idea.  I mean really, I have NO IDEA.  I don’t know her story.  I mean, for all I know, she could have had a very difficult life up to this point.  I REALLY DON’T KNOW, and that’s the problem with jealousy.  I don’t know what it’s like to be her, what she feels, and who she is as a human.  Picture this.  What if you took a homeless person who had been through hell, and overnight made her a multimillionaire.  You gave her a brand new Range Rover, an expensive makeover, and all the right social media photos.  I bet you anything, people would say those exact things I had thought earlier today.  “wow, it must be nice to be her!”  IS IT?  Gosh we really DON’T KNOW, do we??  Sure, there are some people who do seem to live a sort of “charmed life”, but no matter what, we do not know what it’s like to live from their perspective.  I talked myself down from hate laser beams quickly…once I realized how out of hand my thinking had become.

Regardless, her story is not my story.  Sure, she has stuff I want.  That’s a normal, natural part of life.  Just because she has it, doesn’t mean I can’t have it.  There’s enough to go around.  But my story, my timeline, and my path is not hers, and it would be better if I could focus on MY story instead of looking over at hers and wishing that it was mine.  Easier said than done, but it’s something I remind myself of often.  None of us are immune from jealousy, and all of us are guilty from time to time of coveting someone else position in life.  Eyes forward, encourage each other, and keep moving forward.  That’s what we have to do.  Because looking at each other isn’t really forward is it…it’s more like trying to hop the fence and go sideways.

Gotta wear my attitude like want to wear my clothes.  Boldly and with grace.


My good friend found me this top from her friend up in San Francisco, Souls of California (she has the BEST vintage!) and it’s insane.  It’s drapey and fringy and all the things I love!  I put it with vintage Levi’s, thrifted braided huarache like sandals and this amazing white turquoise necklace handmade by DesertMermaid.

Hope you are loving living YOUR story this week!  I’m working on that right now… 😉
Katy

 

On Movie Watching Habits and…Kimonos

My poor husband.  I am quite literally, one of the worst people in the world to watch a movie with.  Why, you may ask?  I’m going to tell you.  Now, I’m not defending my movie watching dysfunction, or trying to help you understand me or anything like that.  Because I know that my movie issues are not really “logical” so to speak, and until they come out with a drug for “very choosy about movies”, then this is me, watching (or really not watching) movies.  Get ready.  You may not like me very much by the end of this post, because I will inevitably have offended you by telling you I hated one of your favorite movies or turned off a movie that you watch repeatedly.  And for this, all I can say is, I’m sorry, and I wish I could change it too.

If you were a movie, unless you are one of the Pitch Perfect movies or Jurassic Park/World series…I just may not like you that much.  I can’t explain this strange phenomenon, again, it just…IS.  Let me tell you how this goes for me.  I start a movie.  I’m hopeful, cautiously optimistic, and determined to like (tolerate at best) this freaking movie.  Halfway through, I’m like okay, this isn’t my favorite, I’m not in absolute LOVE, but I’m committed and I’m doing it.  Then, right about at 3/4 of the way through this storyline, something happens.  Usually, whatever’s going on is about to reach it’s peak, and I begin to lose my patience.  At this point, I have the realization that if the main character had just NOT lied or cheated on his wife/gotten a legitimate job instead of stealing/stayed on planet earth…NONE OF THIS WOULD BE HAPPENING.  I begin to question the worthwhile-ness of this character surviving the zombie apocalypse/strange disease epidemic/people with a lot of guns.  And then it hits me.  Because of his/her stupidity, I have WASTED THE PAST HOUR OF MY LIFE stressing about him/her.  I then start imagining a giant bomb obliterating everyone in the movie, a British voiceover saying “And NOW for something COMPLETELY DIFFERENT”, and a herd of puppies running onto the set, playing with chew toys and being generally more deserving of my time and attention.  True story.

I often read the bad reviews of movies before risking seeing them in the theatre (and believe me, that is quite a risk for me).  I read the bad ones, because usually I can tell by the critiques whether or not I will like the movie.  I mean, the good ones can be telling too.  “Sweeping landscapes” means: “I could just look out the window and save my time and money”.  “Heartwarming story” means: “someone will probably get a weird disease and/or die in this movie.”  “Amazing special effects” means: “the writers all quit so the story is complete crap…but hey a lot of things blow up, so it’s all okay.” And the ALWAYS inevitable “historically accurate” will mean: “everyone dies at the end, don’t waste your time.”  Often the things that people DON’T like about movies are the exact things that will make me LOVE them.  “Formulaic and cute” are often touted as critiques of a movie.  Because, if everyone’s happy at the end of the movie, it seems like a lot of people will inevitably hate it.  I’ve learned that movie critics are often much happier getting jerked around and having the rug pulled out from under them than they are watching people live happily ever after.

I think I’ve been scarred by so many movies, I’ve begun to be an instant skeptic.  I mean Titanic?  Apollo 13?  What the heck people.  Thanks for reminding me that I paid ZERO attention in history class.  Oh and how about the beauty that was The Sixth Sense?  HE WAS DEAD THE WHOLE TIME?  THANK YOU FOR WASTING MY TIME.  (I guess I should have said: “spoiler alert”, but I mean if you haven’t seen that movie or know this by now, I don’t know what to tell you).  I have been emotionally traumatized before, so now I’ve become quite choosy about what I will pay attention to.  Here is a full (but not conclusive) list of topics I refuse to watch movies on.  (You should sit down, it’s not short).

  1. War (any war at all.  Imaginary or real).
  2. Zombies/zombie apocalypse (missing chunks of flesh is not my jam.  I made an exception for Warm Bodies, Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, and Zombieland.)
  3. Post apocalyptic movies (I like happy things, have you noticed?)
  4. Anything too raunchy  (Again, exceptions include Wedding Crashers, Bad Moms, Bridesmaids…beyond these though if it’s too much raunch, I’m out).
  5. Musicals (this only means I don’t like movies where they sing ALL the time.  Also, please don’t tell me something is a “musical” then have it actually be “a movie about war”…I was a child when I watched The Sound of Music and this nice movie where a lady with a sort of bizarre haircut made clothing out of curtains and sang a lot took a dark turn into something where they probably all died at the end.  It’s not nice to do that to people.)
  6. Anything too emotional (Sorry Nicholas Sparks.  If I wanted to cry, all I’d have to do is watch one of those “share a Kleenex” commercials.  Dang lady hormones.)
  7. Anything too violent  (I refuse to watch people hurting each other, even if it is “historically accurate.”)
  8. Most things sports related (There are some exceptions to this one.  If the story is good enough, and not too emotional, per number six on my list, then I may care enough to watch it.  Since I care nothing about sports, it has to be a good story outside of people throwing balls around.)
  9. Things that are too “artsy”  (I love creativity, but if it’s like art for art’s sake, I’m out.)
  10. Superhero movies (I don’t make the rules you guys.  I have learned that these movies usually include a lot of things blowing up and creatures I don’t recognize or know what they are.  I love movies about people with superPOWERS, just not super heroes.  Don’t even get me started on the anti-super hero movies, we will be here all day.)
  11. Things that are about people making stupid choices  (If you’re gonna do it, don’t make me live through the stress of it okay?  I make enough of my own and have to live through them!)

So where does that leave us?   You called it.  Pitch Perfect and Jurassic World.  Somehow watching people sing in perfect harmony and getting chased by fictitious dinosaurs just makes me happy.  Since this post is just so down on movies, let me give you some titles I do love, lest you think I am the worst human on the planet who hates movies and frowns all the time.  Legally Blonde, The Royal Tenenbaums, Clueless, Ghostbusters (all of them), Mean Girls, Easy A (I love movies about high school can you tell?), Beetlejuice, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Back To The Future (all of them), Indiana Jones (all of them except number two because ewwwww), The Man From U.N.C.L.E, Pirates of the Caribbean (all except the last one)…to name a few.  Despite what this post may suggest, I actually do love a lot of movies.  But if I don’t love it?  My poor husband has to live with it.

Good news.  You know what I’m NOT choosy about?  Kimonos or kimono like items.  I nabbed this jacket at the store I work at, and a girl who doesn’t work there that often said: “you like Asian fashion don’t you?”  I was like…”I guess…”  and then realized I was literally wearing a shirt that looks like this jacket…and, um, KIMONOS, DUH.

I mean my gosh, how could you not fall in love with the satiny, gorgeously rich colors, and patterns that make up Asian fashion?  Yeah.  I may not be able to sit through a whole movie, but I could sit through one of those dry cleaning automated racks full of kimonos.  I put this with my Madewell mom jeans (I have them in two colors, they are fabulous) and some thrifted loafers I just scored recently.  My necklace was handmade by DesertMermaid on Etsy.

I bet you are way better at movie watching than me.  I bet you sat through the whole Titanic movie and WEREN’T surprised when they all died.  I’ll bet you love superhero movies and have a blast watching summer blockbusters and are not a “hater” as my husband refers to me.  Ah well.  I’ll always have my automated rack of kimonos to dream about…

Happy Monday
Katy

 

On Social Media and An Amazing Jacket

It’s been easy in the past for me to get kind of down on social media.  I stayed off Facebook completely till less than a year ago and I spent over a year not being on Instagram at all.  Not even to look at what other people were posting.  I’ve had some painful moments due to it, some times when I’ve seen things that have hurt me, made me feel like less than I am, or just discouraged me and caused me to wish things were different or that I was different.  However, I’ve discovered the one thing about it that I wouldn’t trade for anything.  The women I’ve met.  Seriously, I have met some of the greatest girls on Instagram…girls who the only thing that’s not great about them is that they aren’t close enough for me to hang out with!  It’s been SO encouraging and fun to “meet” these girls…whether it’s just in conversations on Instagram or actually in person.

During our recent trip to San Francisco, one of the girls I had “met” on Instagram reached out to me and asked if I wanted to meet up for coffee.  I was so excited because usually on these trips, my husband is in meetings for work and I just hang out by myself, which is fine for a bit, but hanging with someone is preferable to shopping alone!  Before meeting her, I had a moment of panic and I said to my husband: “oh no…I don’t know what she looks like, how will I know who she is??”  And he replied: “ummmm she will most definitely know who YOU ARE!”  Fine, I take a lot of selfies.  I get it.  It’s such an interesting thing meeting someone for the first time…when you’ve already had full conversations with them before.  And not only that, but since you’ve been looking at photo snapshots from their lives for so long, you kind of feel like you know them.  Social media has totally legitimized stalker behavior if you ask me!!  We hung out for the morning, and honestly, I felt like I had known her for years.  And yes, THAT is the amazing thing about social media too…”blind friend dates” are more like being longtime buddies thanks to the fact that you’ve gotten to know each other already.  It’s like a compatibility test for friendship.  Did you both like that photo of that vintage dress that just got posted?  You are 99% compatible as friends.

I had so much fun with her.  This scenario has repeated itself in different locations with different Instagram friends…and every single time, I feel like I’m nailing the friend game.  Which is much different from how it has been for me lately when I meet girls wherever I happen to be.  There’s usually a moment where the new girl I just met says: “I don’t really buy that many clothes…” and I’m like “oh…ok…that’s fun…” (awkward silence because I have no idea what to say next, but I’m guessing it will be about cows because that’s my “go to awkward silence” conversation.  And no, I don’t know anything about cows, which makes it even more awkward than it was.  I should probably find a new topic.)  So social media, forgive me for bashing on you so hardcore, and hey, thanks for all the cool girls you’ve hooked me up with!

The SUPER cool girl in San Francisco embroiders stuff like a boss, hence this INCREDIBLE hand fringed and embroidered denim beauty I’m sporting here.  Honestly, I really don’t have to be cool at all to wear this, because it’s so cool that it makes up for all my lack!!!!  You need to follow her… @township31 on Instagram, and please, have her embroider something for you because she’s the COOLEST PERSON and she’s SO TALENTED!!!

Do you SEE how cool this is?  I’m so thankful to have met her for so many reasons though.  Making friends as an adult is so much harder than it needs to be, and hanging out with her was just so easy.  The moral of the story is this: meet your Instagram friends, because they are even cooler in real life!

Pants are from Nightcap (on sale HERE) and worth the splurge trust me! And the necklace is from Etsy.

Happy start of your week!
Katy

 

On Glitter, Gold, and a Vintage Tunic

Warning.  In this post, I’m going to most likely mention Twilight a lot, so if you don’t like Twilight, well, that’s just too bad for you.

I have to preface this by saying I know nothing of real “vampire” culture, as defined in the classic vampire fiction or movies.  My previous experience with them was The Count on Sesame Street (and since he was all about counting and numbers and stuff, he was basically SUPER boring to me) and a funny episode of the X Files that introduced Luke Wilson to me as a funny actor.  So when I read Twilight, this was my introduction into vampires, and I’m pretty sure that to most people it was offensive since the culture laid out in that story was pretty tame and silly in comparison.  Which is, exactly why I loved it.  I tried watching True Blood, but those vampires were so mean that I immediately stopped.  What the heck True Blood?  Where’s the sparkly skin?  That’s like the main reason I loved Twilight!

Years ago, I was at an event, and the ice breaker for the evening was: “If you were a superhero, what would your superpower be?” I listened to all the very sophisticated answers…like “I would fly because that would be amazing to see the world from afar”, and “I would be invisible so that I could hear what other people were saying without them knowing I was there” (what a nightmare that would be, by the way!), and I was absolutely bored OUT OF MY MIND.  I mean, come on you guys.  A little originality goes a LONG WAY and these answers are just so traditional and I can’t even believe that no one has an answer I’ve never thought of.  So when they got to me, naturally I decided to veer away from the norm.  Because, I’m a total rebel.  🙂  My answer was: “I would sweat glitter”.  Everyone stared at me like I was an insane person.  Which I am.  But that’s beside the point.  I then explained my reasons (which I will list below) and yet, still no one understood.  I guess I’m just to weird for the general population!

Here are my reasons, so that you too can get on board with this unappreciated genius.  1. I sweat a LOT.  Like more than my husband and maybe as much as one of those football dudes that everyone’s always going on about.  So if I were to sweat glitter instead of actual sweat, I would never have to worry about deodorant fails, sweaty pits, or gross yellowing of my white shirts.  I’d just be beautiful and glittery like Edward Cullen and people would marvel at my glory in the sunlight.  Oh, and I’d never need luminizer.  Think about that gem for a minute why don’t ya!  2. I’d be super popular at all the parties.  I mean, imagine you could make it rain glitter at any moment (just turn the heater up and you’re golden…literally) and you’d be a party HIT!  3. It could be weaponized.  Think about it…someone comes at you, you start sweating, and you just kind of fling the glitter at their faces…bam.  Weaponized glitter.  It’s glamorous, and effective.

Now that you’re all on board with my amazing scientific advance, we just need to start a campaign to turn this character I’ve created in my head into a movie, a book series, and an action figure that when you heat it up, produces glitter.  But until then, I have this outfit to simulate my fantasy.

Yes, I know what you’re thinking.  “But will you wear that in real life??” you ask.  Do you know me BUT AT ALL?  So yeah I’m definitely wearing this amazing sparkly vampire tunic!!!!  It’s handmade out of vintage fabric by the amazing Mod Melrose (sold though aavintedge.com) and it’s pure glory in a gold tunic.  I put it with my amazing gold Lenni the Label velvet bells, but you can also get them here and here and here.  That incredible necklace was handmade by the oh so fabulous Desert Mermaid on Etsy and she’s a master of jewelry making!

I hope no one’s out there sweating right now…and if you are, imagine that it’s glitter and you’ll TOTALLY get what I’m saying!

Katy

On Being Born Free and This Tee That Reminds Me

I heard someone say something that really resonated with me today.  He said: “We were built for victory.  But fear keeps us in defeat.”  It really struck me for two reasons.  One, I don’t often believe that I was actually BUILT for victory.  I just assume that sometimes, dreams just don’t work out and accepting reality is just part of life.  And two, fear has been a major sticking point for me on a lot of things in life.  I was born a bold risk taker, and then rewired to be fearful and overly cautious to a fault.  So when I heard that statement, it really rocked my mind!

I was talking with my husband yesterday about how before we went through our few years of intense struggles, I had this very specific and intense goal and plan.  It was something that I had literally dreamed about since I was a child…and it was this thing that sort of drove me to keep going in a lot of ways.  I’m SUCH a goal oriented person, that it was a large, and sometimes too large, part of my life and my thoughts.  Then, when we lost all of what we had worked for and basically had to start over (and at a deficit no less!) I had gone for so long without even the hope of this goal, that it was gone.  It was like it was completely dead and buried in a graveyard of dreams that would never be.  And for a while, I was sort of “okay” with that.  I think in my recovery process, for a while I just couldn’t really deal with any more loss…I had lost enough, so the thought of dealing with things I never had and lost was just too great a burden to bear.  But after a while, I began to feel more and more of a whole person and then, the actual hole that the dream had left became more apparent.  In straight terms, I sometimes feel like I lack the vision and passion I had before.

Maybe some of that’s good.  That vision and passion drove me so hard, even to the point of depression at times because I could not immediately attain it, that it needed to take a breather.  It needed to be there, encouraging me forward, but not in a way that I could not enjoy life in the meantime and the journey to get to it.  However, I think I would like to regain some of that vision.  Because if I was “meant for victory”, then this story isn’t finished.  I told my husband that I go back and forth between thinking that my goals and dreams are not dead and that they’re still going to happen…and that I should just let them go and assume that they are a thing of the past.  His response was that the latter of the two options was dangerous, because it would allow me to slip into a state of apathy and acceptance for something that is temporary.  He was right.  I was not “meant for defeat”, even though defeat is sometimes part of the journey.  I was born free of fear…and the fear of hoping and dreaming again is what can keep me from that victory.

I have to remind myself that sometimes my leaning towards fears and accepting defeat are not part of who I am.  They were learned, and now I must UNlearn them and stand in the victory I was meant to.  Because I can still work for, believe for, and hope for the things that I was meant to experience.  THAT is victory even in the times when things are not obviously victorious!

I know you probably can’t read it, but this shirt says: “Born Free” so I thought it was appropriate for this post!  I gotta say, this outfit is pretty much straight inspired by Spell Designs…I can never get enough of their bohemian eclectic colorful fringy goodness!  The boots are old Sam Edelman, but fringe booties are EVERYWHERE now, and an absolute essential for the fringe lover like myself!  The skirt is Free People, the top is Bandit Brand (amazing vintage inspired graphic tees!), and the jacket is Off Fifth.  The belt is from “my” store (I call it “mine” because I love it and I have the privilege of styling there!) so it’s second hand amazingness!  Don’t forget about the necklace.  Ohhhhh that necklace is new from Zachary Pryor on Etsy.  Gotta love a good statement piece!

I hope you’re dreaming big and feeling free today!
Katy

On Collaborating and A Sweet Deal For You!

When it comes to vintage clothing, I’ve discovered that there are two types of people.  People who love vintage, and people who do not.  Amongst the people who do not, there tend to be varying reasons why…for example they just don’t know how to wear it, it doesn’t fit them correctly, or they just really love new stuff as opposed to older things.  All of those reasons I completely understand, however I firmly fall into the first category obviously!  I love owning things that had a story and a life before me.  I love finding unique things from decades past and giving them new life.  And I love how detailed and intricate most of those vintage items were made…by hand and with purpose and intention.  And I love finding people who love vintage like me.

I got to meet (on Instagram) the girls behind The Reformed Moth (a shop on Etsy and also a storefront in Newport, Rhode Island) and these girls really GET vintage.  They reached out to me to do a collaboration (my first one!) and style some of their pieces, so of COURSE I jumped at the opportunity!  I was not disappointed.  These girls have mad taste.  Honestly I could buy and wear everything on their shop if they were all in my size!  Every piece I tried on was absolutely FLAWLESS.  This is QUALITY vintage.  This is not “thrift store” vintage…this is boutique, handmade, in PERFECT condition vintage.  And I loved every piece I got to style.  I had such a great time and each of these four pieces were on their own so stunning that I did my best to respect them and show them off for the artwork that they are.  I’m excited to share them with you and also give you a little incentive to check out their shop below! 🙂

This first dress was just stunning on it’s own when I put it on.  It was very fitted on me, so I was kind of expecting it to not flatter me, but I felt SO sexy in it with the side slits and body hugging shape.  I added a thin scarf in pink and ankle booties in orange because they brought out the gorgeous spring florals in the pattern.  I love this dress with gold jewelry because it adds a little glamour!

I LOVE the bright pink on this velvet tunic dress!  It is so bold and fun!  Because it’s so vibrant, I wanted to add a lot of neutrals and go a little western with this piece because it’s kind of an unexpected twist.  This dress is SO so soft and fully lined too…it is just gorgeous on its own.

This dress was one that kind of surprised me when I put it on, because the sleeves…oh those sleeves!  It has these PERFECT flutter sleeves that are SO flattering and so fun to wear.  I wanted to switch it up from a typical retro housedress style to something more bold, so I added this giant gold bohemian collar necklace and tall lace up moccasins.  Those flutter sleeves kind of gave a little bit of an allowance for this more traditional pattern and style to be more wild and free and less vintage housewife.  This dress could be worn over skinny jeans, bell bottoms, with flats or heels…and still be stunning.  It’s a total style chameleon!

And now, for the piece that stole my heart with its sweetness factor.  This little tunic dress is clearly handmade and just the cutest thing ever.  I put it over a vintage puffy sleeve top and used simple tall boots because I didn’t want anything to interfere with the adorable detailing on this dress.  Jewelry really would just detract from it, so I left it off.  I think this was my absolute favorite piece to style because of its uniqueness and it’s pretty accents and front pockets!

You guys need to check out this shop.

Danielle and Rebecca started The Reformed Moth five years ago, and their original intention was to upcycle vintage clothing.  They began finding pieces that were so good as they were, that they decided to not mess with perfection and sell them in their original state!  They are just like me…LOVE the thrill of the perfect vintage find at a flea market…those pieces that are wearable and on trend even though they were made long ago.  These girls have excellent standards and taste…you’ll see when you look through their shop.  They were named “Newport’s Best Kept Secret” in a local magazine…and once you take a look, you’ll see why!

Go shop!  Get 25% off with code statelyvelvet 🙂

I’m really grateful to these girls for giving me the chance to style some of their pieces.  I’m hooked!

Katy

On Vintage Slips and Definitely Never Feeling Popular

When I was a kid, since I was home schooled, church was my only school-like experience.  I remember most of my Sunday school teachers because they were the only teachers I ever had until high school.  Some of them were great and others were less than amazing.  I had this one teacher when I was probably around eight years old who was the worst of them all.  He was just bad, plain and simple.  He had no kids and clearly knew nothing about them besides how to screw them up.  He had decided that one of the girls in my class was the most beautiful, talented, and constantly praise worthy person in my small universe.  To be completely honest, she was recognized as this by everyone at church.  She was, to put it simply, the “popular girl” in high school…but instead of it being high school, it was kids in elementary school.  She was beautiful.  She sang beautifully.  She was the IT girl of Sunday school.  Our teacher would point this out basically every Sunday.  He would say things like: “everyone wishes they could be like her” and “she’s the most beautiful star of the class”.  I, on the other hand, was none of these things.  I always wanted to be the lead part in the little plays we would put on, but she always got those parts because I had no confidence to even try…and I knew she was a shoe in anyway.  I was awkward, home schooled, wore bad glasses, and had zero idea of who I was so I was very quiet and shy and lonely.  I remember going home and crying, wishing I could just be her.  I remember wondering why I was me, and why I wasn’t a “star” like her.  I probably wasn’t the only person who felt like this, given his intense obsession with publicly praising the golden girl of the Sunday school class.

Today, I was downtown and I saw a mom who looked like she had it all together.  She was dressed perfectly and her baby had a super cute outfit on and they seemed so happy and relaxed.  And there I stood.  Feeling fat and disheveled, sweating through my clothing, and once again reminded that I am not “the popular girl”.  Now that may not be really “true” per say, because lots of people like me (although I could definitely write you a list of people who do not like me! Ha!), but on the inside, I probably will never ever feel like “the popular girl”.  You know what?  That’s probably a good thing.  I had the (un)fortune of dealing with that same girl later on in life and sure, she was still beautiful, talented, and most definitely popular.  But I saw her derail her own life for a while because she was so convinced of her own status.  And watching this was kind of tragic…mostly because she was not free to be her own person.  Since she had been praised and labelled and pinned as “the popular girl” and over and over again told WHO she was and HOW SPECIAL she was, she couldn’t be anything other than who they told her she was. And in reality, no one should be praised like that constantly as a child.  Because we ARE all special and stars and all that jazz.  But we should have some kind of goals to strive for and some room to grow and find out who we are.  No matter WHO that is and WHAT that looks like.  There are times when I remember how much it hurt to be compared constantly to someone else and to always fall short.  But then I realize that it gave me the opportunity to really be myself and to really learn who that is.  Which, I’m still doing quite clearly. 🙂

I have ALWAYS loved vintage slips.  I had a bazillion for a while, then in a moment of weakness, got rid of some of them.  And now, I’m in love with them all over again.  They were kind of a “style signature” for me before I got pregnant and before I kind of lost who I was for a while.  I think that they will be again because I still love them and feel like I have a whole new way to wear them than I used to!

I got this kind of crazy, bordering on 1980’s floral top from a thrift store and I love how the sleeves are under this vintage slip!  I feel like it tones down the craziness of it!  The red cowboy boots are vintage from a shop on Etsy and the squash blossom is from Classic Rock Couture.

Popular or not popular, we all just gotta be ourselves right?

Happy middle of the week 🙂
Katy

On The Unexpected…Kids AND Outfits

Being a parent is so weird.  And being a mom is even weirder.  I mean, one day you just look around and wonder: “what on EARTH happened?”  I mean, there are these little people who you are responsible for 100 percent of the time.  They rule your calendar, your time, and your choices.  Like, all the time.  Life is an adventure with them.  Some days, it’s a great adventure.  And other days, it’s a hard one.  There are days when I laugh all day long at these kids because they are hilarious and I can’t stand the thought of them getting bigger because they’re so dang cute.  Then there are days when it’s all I can do to not break down and cry for missing the things that I don’t get to do for the time being.  Like binge watching tv shows with my husband on the couch, or going ice skating at Christmas, or heck, seeing freaking Star Wars in the theatre before the entire universe has seen it five times already and told me HOW INCREDIBLE IT IS.  I KNOW!!  IF I COULD, I WOULD SEE IT OKAY?!?  Rant over.  Sorry for that.

I think it’s hilarious to look back and think about what I used to think about having kids.  Because reality is ALWAYS different than you think, right?  In some ways, it’s way better than I thought it would be.  And in others, it’s way harder.  I remember seeing a kid have a full on meltdown in Target and thinking to myself: “yeah, I’m not gonna let my kids do THAT.  I’m gonna have that situation under control.”  Enter hilarious and uncontrollable laughter.  Because you can totally have toddlers “under control” right??  Homey don’t play that.

I also remember thinking: “I’m totally prepared for this, I have dogs.”  Oh my gosh.  I’m almost busting out loud laughing right now.  Now don’t get me wrong.  I LOVE dogs.  They are in some ways like children.  When they’re puppies they have to be potty trained, they keep you up at night, and heck, they do take emotional energy when they’re sick and they need your care.  I’m not belittling taking care of animals in the least!  But come on.  When your dog is ill behaved, you can LEAVE HIM AT HOME ALONE.  Yeah.  You don’t have to strap him in a carseat while he kicks you and screams and then take him into a store where he bugs you the ENTIRE time you’re trying to think about what you need.  You can basically go about your normal life, short of being home to feed and walk your dogs…and you don’t have to get a babysitter to go to a movie or go out to dinner.  Nope.  I remember thinking that I was oh so prepared…and in reality I was once again, mistaken on this point.

I also expected that having kids was going to be hard.  I really tried to prepare myself for the worst, and then when my son was born, I was so enthralled with him, that I forgot that it was supposed to be hard for a while.  I was amazed at how much I loved him and how I couldn’t imagine life without him.  So it’s funny how much no matter how hard some days are, there are still so many great things that I didn’t expect.  Like last night, my daughter called me back in her room to fix her blanket.  I went in, tucked her in, and then as I was leaving, she called me back in her room.  I asked her what was wrong, and she said in a teeny tiny voice: “wanna say I love you.”  Oh my gosh you guys.  That moment made everything I let go of worth it.  I was wrong in thinking I could prepare myself for the stress, the meltdowns, and the things I would miss.  But I was also very wrong in not preparing myself for the perfect moments, that DO occasionally, exist in motherhood.  🙂

I decided to go with an outfit, that is as usual, unexpected…putting things together that might not normally belong.  Because sometimes, those things work beautifully together in life…even when you’re not prepared for them!

I decided that since it’s winter, to use this top from Ruby Rose as a vest of sorts over this vintage plaid shirt.  I layered the pearl cluster necklace with this amazing black one from Classic Rock Couture.  I’ve never put this top over a collared shirt like this but I love it!

I hope that no matter how your day has been, good or bad, expected or unexpected, that you’re enjoying some part of it!

Katy

On (more) Velvet Bell Bottoms and Becoming a Hippie

Yes, the bell bottoms are back.  Are you really all that surprised?  That’s what I thought.  🙂

Even though this isn’t a lifestyle or beauty blog, I thought I should share with you my slow journey to becoming a hippie.  Mostly because it’s funny, and also because, well, I love bell bottoms and those things seem to go hand in hand right?   I remember watching a few seasons of Mad Men (worth it just for the clothes and the set design!!) and seeing that the year was 1963 or somewhere around that time.  I was watching, wondering…”where is the hippie fashion??”  I mean, it’s the 60s right?  Isn’t that the era of fringe and paisley and bell bottoms?  And all I was seeing on the screen were house dresses and fur coats and kitten heels…all styles that I very much associate with the 1950s.  And then all of a sudden it became so clear in one single episode of the show.  Don Draper travelled to San Francisco (the show was set in NY, but I’m assuming you probably know that) and the minute he stepped off the plane, THERE THEY WERE.  There were the bohemian caftan queens I had been looking for.  THEY WERE IN CALIFORNIA.

I am a beach community dwelling Californian…so it stands to reason that the odds are pretty dang high that I would become a hippie eventually right?  I mean, there’s juiceries, acai bowl places, vegan restaurants, and kombucha on tap basically all over this place.  (My computer’s spell check hates like all of those words, so clearly it’s not a hippie.  We will have to have words later.)  I’m used to people protesting the buying of turkeys outside of Whole Foods around the holidays.  Green Peace people calling me “super mom” (much to my great irritation because I KNOW it’s a ploy to get my attention) and blocking the entrance to Gap downtown so you HAVE to hear about the whales.  This is an area that has that kind of lifestyle.  I was raised with carob and homemade bone broth and yoga and all that jazz.  Although my dad readily fed me Oreos and cheese balls because he said my mom was “trying to poison him”.  I was well prepared in my hippie lifestyle to come despite my brief addiction to MSG laden foods.

It’s kind of happened in phases.  Like I’d read an article about something and then I’d implement something new into our diet or our habits.  I started making homemade bone broth weekly and drinking it daily and also cooking the kid’s food in it.  I got rid of our plastic food storage containers.  I started using coconut oil for everything (and I mean EVERYTHING…I’m basically that guy from My Big Fat Greek Wedding who puts Windex on everything, but with coconut oil) and started buying organic.  And then…the hippie transformation became more serious…like I threw away a giant overflowing grocery bag full of all my favorite brands of cosmetics.  Ouch.  That one hurt.  I still almost cry when I walk by Sephora I miss all my favorites so much.  But I’m slowly replacing it with other brand and it’s good to know that the ingredients are safe for myself and my children when they get lots of mama kisses!  I started making my own toothpaste and getting more into essential oils.  And then one day, I realized that the girl who used to be annoyed by her mom grinding her own peanut butter has now become even too hippie for Whole Foods.  I mean, you know you’re in trouble when you ask someone who works at WHOLE FOODS for a product and they look at you like you asked them for a magical unicorn that fits in your pocket.  True story.

Ahhhh yes, I am now a California hippie.  I still shave, pluck, wax, and use deoderant (hippie deodorant), and I refuse to camp.  I sure as heck am not sleeping outside in what I can only assume the bears would think is a burrito wrapper.  But in most other ways, I am a kombucha drinking acai loving hippie.  I know a lot of this stuff is becoming mainstream…so I’m not alone in my journey and that’s awesome.  I’m not gonna say much more than this about it all because there are SO MANY amazing blogs about this kind of stuff.  Like Wellness Mama.  That woman is so amazing it’s kind of scary.  I mean, when you check out her blog, think of it as a resource, otherwise you will end up in the fetal position when you realize she’s pregnant with her sixth child, makes her own homemade plastic wrap, crawls through the attic to put in ethernet cables, all while running a huge blog and homeschooling her children.  My kids are currently watching Netflix while I wonder how many meals in a row they have eaten frozen pizza.  So…you catch my drift here.

I love bohemian hippie fashion.  These velvet bells are the newest to my collection and they were custom made by MXCI UK who was kind enough to search high and low for this color for me!  She’s amazing!  The top was just SO classic hippie that I couldn’t resist putting it with the bells for a true 1960s flair.  The squash blossom is from Classic Rock Couture, one of my favorite Etsy shops.

Wildfox tank and Free People bra with a hit of turquoise.  I love the more casual look with these pants because I feel like it’s a great way I can wear them while running errands.

I love this mustard lace shift dress I got at a step from Forever 21 because it totally looks vintage!  The gold arrowhead looking necklace is from Free To Wander and the other is thrifted.

There’s certain things I just can’t do.  Like let go of my Keurig for example even though it’s not the most organic or natural coffee.  But I’m only human right?  I’m probably never gonna be as natural as Wellness Mama or those other super bloggers, but I’m going to keep doing what I can and TRY not to stress about what I can’t do.  Ha.  Easier said than done for me!!!

Hope you beautiful women are having a wonderful start to your week!

Katy