Have you ever noticed how many times a day we say: “I need ____”? I find myself saying it all the time. Constantly. And then sometimes, I wonder, do I really need what I just said I did? I’m not always sure I do. I’m not talking about like, a new pair of shoes, or a fur bomber jacket. We ALWAYS NEED those things (can I get an “amen” from all you fashionistas out there?)! That’s not the direction I’m going with this. No, on the contrary, what I mean is this: I often think I need things to be a certain way before I can go on and do other, new things. Like, I want all my ducks in a row before I start something new. (If I had ducks, they would be in a row. It’s how ducks are supposed to be.) This is the problem of the non-procrastinating personality. I was the kid who finished her homework before getting home because I wanted to go have fun, and there was no “fun” for me if my homework wasn’t done. I like to work first, play after. It makes my brain feel better.
While that is a good quality to have, it’s not always, shall we say…realistic, when it comes to real life. It’s all well and good when you’re in school or have a job where you are able to check things off a list and keep everything in a nice spreadsheet. But in my experience, life is much messier than this. There’s things that don’t fit into categories, the lines all blur together, and there’s no finishing all the things you need to do…like…ever.
I found myself recently hearing about someone who had basically everything they needed in life. Like everything. There was security, there was money, there was space both physically and mentally to be organized. And I found myself feeling a little…angry about it. I started thinking things like: “yeah! That’s what I need. I shouldn’t be starting a clothing line or trying to work like I am without the space or resources!” I felt a wave of righteous outrage flow over me. And I felt completely justified in feeling this way. I mean, logically, shouldn’t you have everything you need BEFORE you start something new? The answer to that is as plain and simple as the nose on your face. No.
Here’s why my “righteous anger” is completely unfounded. Because when I have the time, the space, and no need to move forward, I will not. There is something about a small amount of messiness, a need for forward motion in life, and some “lack” I will call it…that can cause incredible creativity. Diamonds are not made in a cabana on the beach. They are made in the fire. Most people in history who did incredible things were not sitting there in mansions surrounded by everything they needed. No, they actually did not have what they needed, which is what gave them the drive to move forward. Now I know, it’s not like a recipe for creativity or an equation that says “need causes creating”. It’s more of an observation really on myself, and on the human race.
So yeah. I need certain things. The need is real. But that “need” shouldn’t be something that I focus on. When we are in that fire, in that place of discomfort, we have got to focus on what’s in our hearts. That thing that drives us. Because often the most beautiful art comes out of discomfort, disappointment, and, well, need. I got over my indignation when I realized that I only started writing as much as I am, when I ceased having the free time to do so. Do you see what I mean? When I had the time, I didn’t use it. The need has created the desire.
Don’t worry. I will never every tell you that you don’t need an article of clothing. I’m literally the worst person to ask when you want to make a decision because my default it that if you’re asking, you probably need it! And no matter if you are in a place of comfort, discomfort, need, or plenty, don’t let yourself forget about what lights your fire. No matter what space you are in, you can create. You can build something. You can move forward. And if you don’t feel the need to move forward in your own life, you can do it for someone else! We all have gifts, passions, and abilities that we need to share and use. Otherwise, the rest of us miss out on what YOU have to offer!
I almost didn’t get this Free People dress. (I got it second hand). And then, I realized, I needed it. In the good way :) The pink vintage concho necklace is from Classic Rock Couture (love her shop!) and the vintage huaraches I thrifted from Goodwill. All the rest of the jewelry I picked up second hand.
Hope you’re feeling the passion today. Even if it’s just in your brain while you shuttle your kids around back and forth to school…that’s a perfectly good place to create!