Fashion Feelings: Persistance and Suspenders

I’ve always been a persistent person.  I was one of those kids who would eventually find a way to get that thing that I had been wanting (and with my parents, this literally deserves a gold medal) even if it took years.  That dollhouse that I wanted and my dad kept saying “no” to?  Under the Christmas tree.  It took about three years, but I finally got it.  I’m one of those people who doesn’t give up easily.  You say it’s not possible?  I don’t always believe you.  Because I’ve seen things that are “impossible” happen.  Quite a few times actually.

There was a time in my life, a few years ago, where I had to “give up” on a lot of stuff.  I had to walk away from friendships, jobs, and even dreams for a while.  It felt like death to be quite honest.  I am not the kind of person who gives up on relationships.  If I love you, I’m in it for the long haul.  (And odds are, I probably love you.)  I remember sitting in a meeting at work when I was working full time.  One of the older, wiser guys who had been there, done that MUCH longer than any of us had, said something so simple and yet deep, that it stuck with me to this day.  He said: “real friends take sides”.  Wow.  Now, don’t get me wrong.  This is not a vengeful, childish playground version of taking sides.  This is not an “agree with everything someone does even if it’s destructive and harmful” kind of take sides.  No.  This is a real take sides…an: “I love you, and because you are my friend, I will choose relationship with you over other people if it comes to that.  I will support you and care for you regardless of what you do and what you’re going through.”  That.  Is what it means to take sides.  For some reason, I think I’ve never really heard someone I respected say something like this before.  And it really released me to feel like I could be the fierce kind of friend that I wanted to be.  But then, for a while, I wasn’t allowed to be fierce and fight for other people.  I had to be fierce and fight for myself for a time.  And that’s important too.

Just recently, I’ve felt like the fighter in me is coming back.  Not the “trying to survive” fighter, more like the: “I have dreams and passions bigger than myself” fighter.  The one who wants to go the distance and NOT GIVE UP on what I can see in my mind.  Because life is not about surviving, it’s about thriving.  And anyone who’s struggled or struggling knows that there are times of simply just surviving…but those need to come to an end and we were built to thrive and pursue hopes and dreams as well as putting food on the table.  That’s the kind of stuff that feeds our soul and keeps us from sinking into a life of mediocrity where we numb ourselves to our true feelings.  Feelings are important, sometimes painful, but necessary for us to thrive!

In this metaphor, persistence is like suspenders.  It holds your pants up.  So maybe our pants stay up by themselves in this day in age, but bear with me.  Not giving up is what keep our pants on…it’s the pizzazz in our outfit, the jazzy snazzy little part of ourselves…that really and truly keeps our outfits together.  Lose your tenacity, lose your pants.  Your whole outfit falls apart.  Giving up is like allowing ourselves to sort of dissolve into a shadow of who we are supposed to be.  It’s our persistence that drives us, even when things are bad.

I’ve been on a suspenders kick.  Maybe it’s just my stubbornness, but I’d kind of like to bring back this archaic fashion piece…because they’re fun!  I got these rainbow suspenders on Poshmark and I love them!  They make every outfit brighter and weirder and that makes me happy.

Don’t give up.  And try on some suspenders.


Cool Copying: Leopard. Again.

Do you ever see an outfit and just kind of get obsessed with it?  Like, you see a picture of an ensemble, and it’s all you can think about.  You look at it and can almost feel how amazing it would feel on your body.  What?  No that never happens to me!  JUST KIDDING!  (Insert string of laughing till their crying emojis here).

This happens to me…more than I care to admit.  Sometimes we will be out shopping and my son will see a toy, and literally talk about it for days, and almost nothing else.  While it’s easy to find this annoying and all as a parent, I completely understand how he feels!  It’s like this part of your brain that sees something, and triggers this reaction where you think: “if I just got that one THING my life would be complete…”  (Again, insert hilarious laughter emojis because we know how untrue this feeling is!)  So yeah, I get how he feels.  I’m an adult, (I think?) so I know logically now that stuff obviously doesn’t make me happy per say, and that there will always be another “thing/outfit” that makes me feel this same level of obsession.  All that to say, instead of obsessing like crazy and then spending obscene amounts of money just to have something I need, I’ve started a list.

Now, when I see something that triggers that “I need” part of my brain, I’ve started a little list of things that I’m watching out for.  Then, what happens is after a few days of looking, I either sort of forget or change my mind about whatever it is I’m hunting for, I decide to invest a decent amount of money on it because I’ve realized it will be worth it, OR I decide to hold out till I find it for a steal.  This has become a good system for me because it helps out my tendencies towards an obsessive brain!

I was reading through my daily news (all style related of course!) and I came across this outfit on Who What Wear.

Let’s be honest.  There’s Gucci in it, which of course makes me want it.  But the principle of the outfit is simple.  Slip dress, graphic tee, slides.  I have done stuff like this before, but something about this combo is like just enough vintage, just enough Los Angeles cool, and just enough easy to make me need it.  So, I started shopping for a leopard slip dress.  If you look at the actual links to this outfit, you will see that it costs quite a pretty penny.  I’m not opposed to that.  However, besides the Gucci, nothing in this outfit is…not repeatable.  I found a slip on Poshmark for $4 you guys.  So…just saying, sometimes feeding your item/outfit obsession isn’t that bad!

See what I did there?  I took a vintage graphic tee, a second hand leopard slip (these are rather plentiful you guys), and a pair of slides (not Gucci, but I WILL GET THERE!), and done.  I done copied this outfit, y’all.  I could have spent $200 on a leopard slip dress.  That would have been fine.  But the difference is, the dress I got for $4 is basically the same thing as this one.  This is different than, obsessing over a Gucci bag.  (which I am, can you tell?)  There may be no substitute for that one item, so you gotta shell out the big bucks.  But it pays to know the difference right?

Go forth, and copy.  It is, after all, the highest form of flattery!

Real World Style: Military Shirts

Isn’t it funny how while some things in fashion come and go, certain things never seem to really ever go out of style?  I mean, I’m pretty sure that leopard print, while it is inordinately hot at the moment, never really goes “out” of style.  And how about florals and plaids?  There’s another example.  Those prints may have their big moments on the runway or in magazines, but they never really go away.  Military tops and jackets are some of those items that I find seem to always, ALWAYS, be around.  I think the way people wear them varies from season to season, but let’s be quite honest…I don’t think I’ve ever seen a fashion report that said they were a no-no.  Not that I ever really listen to those reports anyway…because if I love it, it’s “in style” in my closet and in my life!  End of story!

I always feel a little, how do I say this…poser-y wearing military stuff because, I am a wuss.  I complain when I get like, less than nine hours of sleep and when my coffee is not the exact brand I love, so being a part of something as intense as the military is just not the right fit for me.  Clearly.  So my rules for military inspired wear for myself is that it must look “fake” enough so that no one thanks me for my service or thinks I just went on a shopping spree at the army surplus store.  The other trick to pulling off this trend is also to mix it with other styles.  When you put an army jacket with, say, a floral maxi dress or boyfriend jeans and a graphic tee, no one will think you just got off active duty.  Although, once I did get asked if I was a den mother…but being asked if I’m part of the Girl Scouts, while still quite laughable given my feelings about nature, is a different story altogether!

The bottom line is this: military tops and jackets can add a lot of structure and interest to a normal outfit!  They give girly dresses an edge, and frame a tee shirt and jeans quite nicely.  Just remember, if someone salutes you as you walk by, you may need to rethink your combo.

This top is vintage, and when I found it on Poshmark, I knew I had to have it.  It looks to me like a military commander’s shirt (if you’re gonna wear military, may as well wear something that says you’re in charge right?) and I couldn’t pass it up.  And of course, I had to send it to my friend Arwyn (@township31) who at some point, will probably have fringed, embroidered, and painted on my entire closet.  Let’s just get real here.  She added the gold dipped (her genius idea) leather fringe on the front, thereby taking it from strict military into the blurry realm of…cowboy military?  Not sure there’s a category for that, but I’ll just go ahead and start one.  I will definitely wear this as a regular button down with my jeans, but for starters I wanted to play with it a little more.  I threw it over a green slip dress to kind of pay homage to the army green part of the military trend and then put the short combat boots with it to tie it all together.  It’s a little 90’s, a little 80’s, and a little crazy…just how I like it.

If you love military style, I salute you.  And if you’re part of the ACTUAL military, I really really salute you.  Because the store has been out of my favorite coffee for a month now and I am NOT a happy camper.

Happy Monday!


On Persistance and Finding What You’re Looking For

Okay you guys.  Pretty sure my brain went on vacation without me this week, because I can’t seem to locate it.  If you see it, will you tell me?  Gah.  I’ve been doing all sorts of insane things like attempting to clean ALL my kids toys and trying to get this clothing line off the ground into production…all while my digestive system has been not allowing me to have coffee.  Awesome.  My brain probably went out for coffee without me.  I have discovered that I care quite a bit less about…uh, EVERYTHING…when I can’t have coffee.  And I don’t care what the “coffee alternatives” promise, they all sit on a THRONE OF LIES.  Anyway.

Besides being in a zombie-like state and trying to get my system to normalize so I can have the sweet nectar of the gods once more, I’ve been mostly focusing on putting one foot in front of the other with Velvet California.  And that’s not easy for me.  I’ve never been a “one foot in front of the other” type of person.  I’m a “do it as fast as you can and don’t bother to read the instruction manual” type of girl. You know, the kind who will take off running in the wrong direction just because I didn’t have time to listen to the rest of the instructions.  (Probably why I’m bad at sports).  I’m the one who doesn’t ever listen to the ENTIRE voice message before I hit “call back”, therefore I’m mostly confused about everything, all the time.  Yep.  Good qualities right?

I’m getting there.  Friends ask me if I’m excited and, well, OF COURSE I am…I don’t want to belittle that fact.  However, it often feels so overwhelming to me because I am doing one thing at a time…and I want to just DO IT ALL RIGHT NOW!  And I mean gosh, things are starting to be produced!  But the money that it takes up front…the details that go into every single thing…the decisions on sizes, quantities, and timing…sometimes all feel a bit…overwhelming.  If I could just have a freakin cup of coffee I feel like I’d be handling this better…

But hey.  One step at a time gets there faster than standing still.  So, that’s what I’m doing!  The first run of the first shirt design have been green lighted (by dropping of a check obviously!) and next up will be the second design and the kimono production…then printing.  It’s happening.  Slower than I want, but faster than it could be, which is a good compromise I think!   Persistence, tenacity, and drive are all things I don’t often seem to lack.  Patience…that’s the little bugger that I can’t seem to nail down!

This outfit is a great example to me of persistance, and even, well patience!  These vintage dresses like this style from the 70’s I’m wearing here, are RARELY found (by me at least!) in my size.  Usually I find these incredible collared maxis in teeny tiny sizes that I could never dream of fitting into.  I walked into my favorite thrift store a week ago and BAM…there it was.  Same with these moccasins.  I have been wanting these House of Harlow beaded beauties since they came out.  I found these on Poshmark for a fraction of the price.  It pays to keep going, keep looking, and NEVER. GIVE. UP.

So there it is.  Brain on vacay and all, I’m still going so I think YOU CAN TOO!!
Love all you beautiful people!