Fashion Feelings: Tiny Annoying Setbacks

Seriously you guys, my life is like one perpetual diet.  And I’m not referring to the fact that I eat healthy.  No, no, that is something I do because I like to do it.  I eat salads instead of fries and acai bowls instead of ice cream because I actually feel better when I do.  What I’m referring to is the calorie counting and the not splurging on even healthy treats.  That’s what I’m talking about.  Yes, it’s called #momlife and the fact that I just don’t get to get as much sleep as I’d like, I tend to run out of energy from changing multiple diapers, cleaning up toys, and loading and unloading kids into car seats…and for all of these things, my body wants MORE FOOD.  So you want to know what happens?  I get into a routine.  I have a great week where I’ve worked out every day, my calories have been #onpoint, and I’m just #killingit.  (sorry for all the hashtags, it’s hard to stop once you start). And then…one of the kids gives me a mild tummy bug, a cold, or wakes up in the middle of the night and BOOM.  Routine destroyed.  #fail.  (#sorrynotsorry omg how do I turn it off??)

It drives me crazy.  I get frustrated because my typical iron clad low carb routine dissolves into me having to eat toast because my stomach is messed up, not working out because I have middle-of-the-night-toddler-freak-out exhaustion, or just overall eating more than I should because I don’t have the time to pay attention to my calorie count.  Or I’m just tired and hungry.  So I eat a little extra. Sure, sure, I need to give myself grace.  I know, I’m crazy hard on myself often when it comes to this stuff, so let’s try to focus on the point I’m making and not that I’m just plain crazy.  Crazy hard on myself or crazy…it’s all about the same thing!

My kids are young.  And it’s so fun to have young kids.  They’re so freaking cute.  But this often causes small “setbacks” in my routine.  It forces me to be okay with some weeks being “bad diet” weeks.  Even though I try my darnedest…sometimes I just need an acai bowl on a day I didn’t work out.  (I know you’re like “Oh my GOSH Katy you’re SO CRAZY!” #sarcasm)  But this is kind of the truth about being a mom at times.  You have to let go of the things you once held dear.  Your precious schedule.

Even though it is hard, and my feelings of frustration are valid, I think it’s kind of good for me at times to just do my best to be okay with who I am right now.  Yes, I will keep working on that dang last ten pounds until I can kick them (and I WILL kick them), but it’s good for me to learn to accept who I am at the moment.  I’m a mom.  I have more of a “mom body” than I used to, and some of that will always remain, weight lost or not.  I have stretch marks.  And sometimes, I won’t be able to stick to my routine.  That needs to be okay with me, because life is about more than just being hyper disciplined, as good as discipline is.

I’m thankful for clothes like this, because you know what?  They always look good.  I don’t have to be having a “thin day” to wear them and feel great about myself.  This cocoon wrap is from Aavintedge, and her mom (@modmelrose) is just about the coolest seamstress EVER.  My gosh, I want so much more of her stuff.  Scratch that.  I basically want everything she makes.  She uses vintage fabrics and makes the best stuff out of them.  And then there’s stretch velvet bell bottoms.  Go get yourself a custom pair, why don’t ya?  Because everyone needs more velvet in their lives ;)

Eat a donut for me will ya?

Fashion Feelings: Capes, and (not) Being Supermom

There’s always someone out there with an opinion on whether women can “have it all”.  I’m not here to give my opinion on this idea, however, it was what inspired me to write this, so it has to bear some sort of weight in this post.  I think it’s hard to even give an answer to that plaguing question “can I have it all?” because it’s so highly dependent on what “all” means to you.  I think some women define having it “all” as working and having kids.  Other women would feel slighted by this, and would say that’s not “having it all”, but rather staying home with their children is “all”.  So I’m not going to answer this because there just is no hard and fast answer.  But I think all of us out there with kids are still trying to be supermom, and yes, we are all probably “failing” in our own minds to have it all…whatever that means to us.

I never intended on staying home full time with my children.  That being said, I’m very thankful that I got the chance to do this.  I loved my job and I know that having small amounts of time to focus on other things (other than my children) makes me a better mom.  But given the circumstances of our life at the time that I had my second baby, it would have been a drain on our family and it would have been more hurtful than helpful for us.  So I stayed home, and tried to be supermom.  But that cape is a heavy mantle for me.

For me, I am one of those people who thrives with a job, with a creative passion, and with other creative people around me.  I’m a nerd who loves meetings, organization, and colored tabs in my binders.  Motherhood comes with no binders, and if it did, my kids would promptly smear them with chocolate and destroy them with crayons.  I am not a person that thrives in the chaos of a messy home.  I constantly remind myself that kids need to be messy and that letting go of always having things clean will help me enjoy life more.  But this is a struggle for me.  I wouldn’t trade the time I have at home with my kids for any job, period.  It is priceless.  But that doesn’t mean that it’s not hard.  I often feel stir crazy, crazy exhausted, and just plain crazy.  I am not a great crafting mom, Pinterest mom, or creative mom.  I’m working hard on these things, but it doesn’t come naturally to me.  Speaking in front of people comes naturally to me, but helping my kids with a puzzle pulls muscles in my brain.  It’s funny how natural it is just just love and adore your children…and somehow you think that once you give birth it will also be perfectly natural to know how to make a Disney princess cake from scratch on their birthdays.  For me that is not so.

I am not supermom.  I see a lot of supermoms on Instagram, but I’m going to bet that by their own volition they are most definitely NOT supermoms.  Some days I have to remind myself that I can’t even be a semi decent mom if I don’t take some time away to breathe and do something for myself…let alone be supermom.  There are certain things I think I’m not bad at when it comes to mom-ing.  I cook a lot, I love talking to my kids and reading them stories, singing to them, and shopping with them (big surprise there) and I will be an EXCELLENT Disneyland ride buddy mom.  But crafting?  Getting messy and doing things that I can tell will require extensive vacuuming later?  Playing board games and puzzles?  Not easy for me.  I’ll get there.  But supermom I am not.  I can still wear a cape though, that’s allowed, right?

Capes are making a comeback and if you want to know more about their fashion history, check out this article with some really cool photos.  I got this velvet cape because it is perfect for semi-cool weather (which is something we have a lot over here) and I’ll most likely be wearing it most with jeans or shorts.  Velvet is one of those fabrics that can go SUPER fancy, so pairing it with denim is always an easy way to daytime-it-up.

After all my extensive hair-pulling-out, self shaming, and unashamed comparison on social media, I can only conclude one thing.  Supermom does not exist.  It is a myth that we keep alive in our brains, primarily to torture ourselves.  Kind of like the tooth fairy where we’d actually go to great lengths to TRY and lose teeth (so gross) just to make a couple of bucks.  And in light of this, I will SAY I will stop tormenting myself with images of perfect family photos and event quality birthday parties, but the truth is, I most likely still will.  I am human after all and it comes with the “mom territory” to automatically feel like a failure when things don’t look picturesque.  And with toddlers, most things are covered in crayon scribbles and not in like a cute Instagramable way.

And now, back to the toddler arguments.  And those things are endless.  Happy Friday

Advice In Style: How To Dress For Indian Summer

Welcome to September!  That means only one thing…fall, right?  WRONG!  Hahahaha you thought summer was OVER?  JUST KIDDING!  Well, at least for some of us in certain parts of the US, we were just about to get our sweaters out…and then BAM.  Ninety degree weather is baaaaaack.  Now, I’m kind of a weather rebel.  I mean, in some ways, I kind of have to be in order to get to wear some of my stuff more than like, once a year in California.  However, I also get hot very quickly, so I also experience that same desire to change my style when September hits, but since the weather doesn’t want to change along with me, I gotta improvise.  I’ve got some simple (hopefully!) ideas to help those of us sitting here in shorts and a strapless top, sweating, to keep our style from suffering for it!

Unexpected Denim + Fur Accents

I know.  You’re like FUR??  Are you MAD?  Well, that’s a question for another time.  But back to the outfit.  It may be too hot for jeans and you may be too bored for denim shorts.  How about a little denim pinafore or some shortalls?  I also LOVE fur (as many of you know!) and while it’s not the most wearable for indian summer, a little accent never hurt, right?  Add some boots and a short sleeve tee, and you’ll have a little bit of a transitional style going on without sweating too much!

Light Layers

Layers are HARD when it’s warm.  So the breathability factor is super important during this transition season.  A breathable kimono (this one’s my own and coming soon!) and a graphic tee (again, coming soon!) are good fall-ish pieces to try out when it’s still sweltering outside.

Fall Trends…In Summer Lengths

Velvet is one of those awesome fall trends that I am of course, itching (I mean sweating really!) to wear!  If you can find some of the fall fabrics, but in shorter lengths like this skirt, it really helps to make the piece wearable sooner, before the temperatures start to drop.  So try a velvet flared mini skirt with a lightweight blousy button down.  You’ll feel fall without the major deodorant fail.

Hope you guys are staying cool.  Phew.  Where’s my cold brew…

Switch It Up: Velvet

This fall 2016 trend was made for me.  I mean, let’s get real.  When velvet is not a trend, I will still be happily wearing it in every piece of clothing possible.  I love velvet.  I want everything in my house to be velvet.  It’s my favorite fabric!  So when I started seeing this luxurious fabric pop up everywhere in magazines and on the runway, I let out a resounding cheer and began buying even more of it.  Naturally.

Now not everyone feels this way about it, I understand.  While I love velvet pants and wear them like most people would wear jeans…like a basic…this is not something that everyone would do.  Why not explore some options on how to wear this (amazing) trend, in ways that are economical and approachable?  I have a few options for you in this department!  And none of them are pants, because y’all already know how I feel about them velvet bells. ;)

Committed Relationship

This look is basically a runway hack for the velvet trend.  While you could spend a lot on a velvet dress (which is perfectly acceptable), you could also go to the pajama section of the thrift store (my all time favorite section after the costume section) and keep your eyes out for a nightgown/robe like this one!  The velvet dress is not for the faint of heart, but it is very fall and winter appropriate and very chic.  Keep accessories simple, as this is a statement piece all on it’s own, and boots really make the look wearable.  This dress is a gorgeous option for fall if you’re looking for a very wearable piece!

Just a Tad

If you’re feeling like wearing velvet may be too much for you but you really like this trend and want to mix it in, try a pair of velvet booties!  This makes the trend a little more of an accessory and you can easily wear them with a tee and jeans like I did here.  This pair is very unassuming and not as loud as mine are!

With Some Velvet On Top

Adding a velvet blazer to your look is a great halfway point between completely committed and wearing it as an accessory…and it’s so rock and roll!  Throw one on over a graphic or a band tee with some jeans and you’re an instant cool girl.  You can also put one over a button down with a pencil skirt if you’d like to keep your look more structured and office appropriate!  Either way, it kind of adds that little je ne sais quoi to your look that takes it to the next level.  This blazer is on sale for an insane price and…I want it!!!

No matter how you wear it, it’s a fun trend to try and I hope you’re giving it a test run!

Real World Style: Magazine Fall Style

I love pouring through those amazing haute couture spreads in the latest (or even old editions really) issues of Vogue, Elle, Marie Claire…basically you name a magazine, I love it.  One of the things that’s always a struggle though, is to make the looks they put together actually wearable in real life.  I mean, a lot of haute couture is more art that inspires fashion than pieces that are really supposed to be worn to the grocery store or to a holiday party.  Let’s get real.  Some of those girls on the runways or in the photo shoots…aren’t wearing any underwear.  Sorry guys, I love fashion a lot, but I’m not showing my nipples while buying diapers at Target.  At least intentionally.

Challenging as it can be, sometimes there are looks that are more easily reproducible in those glossy pages than the ones that consist primarily of mesh and body paint!  These are the most fun looks because they are great outfit inspiration when I’m feeling like I don’t know what I want to wear!  One tip I’ve learned…vintage is often a GREAT substitute for haute couture pieces.  Often times vintage is what inspired those pieces we all see and love, and it’s at a fraction of the price and more accessible to those of us who don’t live near a Versace or Gucci store!

I love this look.  The fall feelings…the mixture of the menswear blazer, the feminine pleats, and the gritty rainboots all creates a beautiful piece of art.  This is one of those looks that, may be fantastically pricey and couture, is easily replicated out of normal clothing that is either already in your closet, or is somewhere around you at a normal store!

Everything on me is vintage, except for those Hunter boots.  And you know what, everyone needs a pair of Hunters!  It barely rains here, but when it does, I bust out these amazing things happily!  Micro pleats are a huge trend for fall 2016, and micro pleats are SO VINTAGE!  Here’s a basic option from H&M for a micro pleated skirt dress.  My jacket is an amazing Goodwill find (I watched another girl try it on and waited for her to put it back before snatching it up!) but here’s an incredible velvet blazer that would be SO good with that H&M micro pleat dress!

And there you have it, proof you can dress haute couture without spending the big bucks (unless you wanna, and there is NO judgement from me on that!).

Trending: Pumpkin Spice EVERYTHING

It’s that time of year once again where the leaves are turning brown (I live in California, everything’s basically brown year round), there’s a chill in the air (it’s 90 degrees here today), and everyone’s drinking their first hot pumpkin spice latte (key word here is *hot.  I’m sweating just thinking about it).  What does it all mean?  Two things.  First, fall is here (let the angels sing) and second, America is obsessed with putting pumpkin spice on EVERYTHING.  My husband actually put it on his eggs the other morning.  Hold up with the judgement you guys it was a complete mistake and he most definitely regretted that one, so don’t go planning your breakfasts just yet!  And while people may laugh and make fun of the obsession, I gotta say, it’s a pretty worthwhile thing to be crazy about.  I mean, who doesn’t love fall, and who doesn’t love pumpkins??

Besides the lattes and the eggs (just kidding guys!), the other thing that I’m crazy over right now is the pumpkin COLOR that’s trending for fall!  Sometimes I think that this year someone peered into my brain and came up with the trends because like 40 percent of my closet is orange!  That may be a bit of an exaggeration, but I LOVE ORANGE!  Here’s some runway inspiration to check out…you’ll see what I’m talking about.  It’s like they’re wearing their PSL’s…

As you can see…it’s all ORANGE!  I understand, not everyone is crazy about the color and it definitely can come off a little Halloween-y, so I found a few picks of my own that are a fun addition to any fall wardrobe, and aren’t all as committed as that furry sweater and skirt (gimme gimme gimme gimme).

This Zara dress is amazing with all those fall colors, and has oranges and reds all blended together…an easy wear for the orange phobic!

I absolutely LOVE this H&M kimono cardigan!  It’s a great layering piece in THE color for fall! (it’s only $13!)

Look how adorably retro this skirt from Forever 21 is!

And the piece that EVERYONE NEEDS…velvet bells.  These babies are custom made and freaking gorgeous!  Love a good Homecookedkarma bell bottom!

Whether you love orange or not, hope you’re enjoying the start of fall!

On Uggs, Knockoffs, and A Fabulous Lace Top

When I was younger, I was obsessed with Ugg boots.  All the cool girls I knew wore them.  They looked SO amazing to my childlike eyes (and let’s face it, they are pretty amazing if you’ve ever worn them).  My parents were not shoppers and were most definitely not clothing people, so unfortunately they saw no need to spend however much those things cost when I was seven years old.  Also unfortunately, was the fact that there were no other options at the time for shoes like Uggs…there was only the name brand and the name brand was way too much money for my parents to justify spending on shoes for a kid with fast growing feet.  So alas, I had to go without.  But oh did I want them…and in high school, I saw the first pair of knockoffs I’d ever seen.  I saw them at Ross Dress for Less (the only new place for clothes I really knew existed) and I think they were less than $20.  I bought them of course because this was kind of sort of like my dream come true.  I was so excited.  I’d ALWAYS dreamed of rocking a sweet pair of ridiculously impractical light tan Ugg boots.  So in ninth grade, I wore my new faux Uggs.  Instead of being the gloriously amazing day that it was supposed to be, it was horrible.  My feet were drenched in sweat from the non breathable plastic faux fur and manmade “suede” exterior.  There was this horrible ridge on the heel and I had full on blisters by the end of the day.  I was crushed and never wore those horrid things again.  What a huge disappointment.

Later on in College, I finally opted to buy the real deal.  The ones that have the glorious name brand on the heel, the ones with the thick soft fur that feels like your feet are walking on individual tiny couches, the kind with the soft real suede.  It was a dream come true.  And I kind of realized then and there, that I really didn’t love fakes.  I mean, don’t get me wrong.  I buy plenty of “knockoffs”, copies, and faux things.  But when it comes to stuff like Uggs, a Louis bag (don’t own one yet, but I can dream!!), Louboutins (DITTO), and other high end stuff like that, I just really want the real thing.  There’s just something that feels so special to me about having the real deal…it’s like owning a treasure or something.    Plus, I really just learned my lesson when it comes to trying to get something good without spending money on it.  The memory of how uncomfortable those shoes were lives on in my memory!

I do buy copies sometimes because in reality, most fashion is just copies of something else…and sometimes it just doesn’t matter!  But when it comes to Uggs, I will always be a purist.  :)

I got this top from and it’s on sale for $20!!!  It’s EXACTLY like a Free People one I was lusting after for a long time…and a fraction of the price.  And you know what, as far as copies go, this one is a ringer and it’s SO GREAT.  The bells are from Lenni the Label, but get custom ones here, here, or here.  That amazing necklace is handmade by The Joyful Jewelry Box on Etsy.

Happy weekend to all of you!  Hope it’s a grand one :)


On Glitter, Gold, and a Vintage Tunic

Warning.  In this post, I’m going to most likely mention Twilight a lot, so if you don’t like Twilight, well, that’s just too bad for you.

I have to preface this by saying I know nothing of real “vampire” culture, as defined in the classic vampire fiction or movies.  My previous experience with them was The Count on Sesame Street (and since he was all about counting and numbers and stuff, he was basically SUPER boring to me) and a funny episode of the X Files that introduced Luke Wilson to me as a funny actor.  So when I read Twilight, this was my introduction into vampires, and I’m pretty sure that to most people it was offensive since the culture laid out in that story was pretty tame and silly in comparison.  Which is, exactly why I loved it.  I tried watching True Blood, but those vampires were so mean that I immediately stopped.  What the heck True Blood?  Where’s the sparkly skin?  That’s like the main reason I loved Twilight!

Years ago, I was at an event, and the ice breaker for the evening was: “If you were a superhero, what would your superpower be?” I listened to all the very sophisticated answers…like “I would fly because that would be amazing to see the world from afar”, and “I would be invisible so that I could hear what other people were saying without them knowing I was there” (what a nightmare that would be, by the way!), and I was absolutely bored OUT OF MY MIND.  I mean, come on you guys.  A little originality goes a LONG WAY and these answers are just so traditional and I can’t even believe that no one has an answer I’ve never thought of.  So when they got to me, naturally I decided to veer away from the norm.  Because, I’m a total rebel.  :)  My answer was: “I would sweat glitter”.  Everyone stared at me like I was an insane person.  Which I am.  But that’s beside the point.  I then explained my reasons (which I will list below) and yet, still no one understood.  I guess I’m just to weird for the general population!

Here are my reasons, so that you too can get on board with this unappreciated genius.  1. I sweat a LOT.  Like more than my husband and maybe as much as one of those football dudes that everyone’s always going on about.  So if I were to sweat glitter instead of actual sweat, I would never have to worry about deodorant fails, sweaty pits, or gross yellowing of my white shirts.  I’d just be beautiful and glittery like Edward Cullen and people would marvel at my glory in the sunlight.  Oh, and I’d never need luminizer.  Think about that gem for a minute why don’t ya!  2. I’d be super popular at all the parties.  I mean, imagine you could make it rain glitter at any moment (just turn the heater up and you’re golden…literally) and you’d be a party HIT!  3. It could be weaponized.  Think about it…someone comes at you, you start sweating, and you just kind of fling the glitter at their faces…bam.  Weaponized glitter.  It’s glamorous, and effective.

Now that you’re all on board with my amazing scientific advance, we just need to start a campaign to turn this character I’ve created in my head into a movie, a book series, and an action figure that when you heat it up, produces glitter.  But until then, I have this outfit to simulate my fantasy.

Yes, I know what you’re thinking.  “But will you wear that in real life??” you ask.  Do you know me BUT AT ALL?  So yeah I’m definitely wearing this amazing sparkly vampire tunic!!!!  It’s handmade out of vintage fabric by the amazing Mod Melrose (sold though and it’s pure glory in a gold tunic.  I put it with my amazing gold Lenni the Label velvet bells, but you can also get them here and here and here.  That incredible necklace was handmade by the oh so fabulous Desert Mermaid on Etsy and she’s a master of jewelry making!

I hope no one’s out there sweating right now…and if you are, imagine that it’s glitter and you’ll TOTALLY get what I’m saying!


On Collaborating and A Sweet Deal For You!

When it comes to vintage clothing, I’ve discovered that there are two types of people.  People who love vintage, and people who do not.  Amongst the people who do not, there tend to be varying reasons why…for example they just don’t know how to wear it, it doesn’t fit them correctly, or they just really love new stuff as opposed to older things.  All of those reasons I completely understand, however I firmly fall into the first category obviously!  I love owning things that had a story and a life before me.  I love finding unique things from decades past and giving them new life.  And I love how detailed and intricate most of those vintage items were made…by hand and with purpose and intention.  And I love finding people who love vintage like me.

I got to meet (on Instagram) the girls behind The Reformed Moth (a shop on Etsy and also a storefront in Newport, Rhode Island) and these girls really GET vintage.  They reached out to me to do a collaboration (my first one!) and style some of their pieces, so of COURSE I jumped at the opportunity!  I was not disappointed.  These girls have mad taste.  Honestly I could buy and wear everything on their shop if they were all in my size!  Every piece I tried on was absolutely FLAWLESS.  This is QUALITY vintage.  This is not “thrift store” vintage…this is boutique, handmade, in PERFECT condition vintage.  And I loved every piece I got to style.  I had such a great time and each of these four pieces were on their own so stunning that I did my best to respect them and show them off for the artwork that they are.  I’m excited to share them with you and also give you a little incentive to check out their shop below! :)

This first dress was just stunning on it’s own when I put it on.  It was very fitted on me, so I was kind of expecting it to not flatter me, but I felt SO sexy in it with the side slits and body hugging shape.  I added a thin scarf in pink and ankle booties in orange because they brought out the gorgeous spring florals in the pattern.  I love this dress with gold jewelry because it adds a little glamour!

I LOVE the bright pink on this velvet tunic dress!  It is so bold and fun!  Because it’s so vibrant, I wanted to add a lot of neutrals and go a little western with this piece because it’s kind of an unexpected twist.  This dress is SO so soft and fully lined too…it is just gorgeous on its own.

This dress was one that kind of surprised me when I put it on, because the sleeves…oh those sleeves!  It has these PERFECT flutter sleeves that are SO flattering and so fun to wear.  I wanted to switch it up from a typical retro housedress style to something more bold, so I added this giant gold bohemian collar necklace and tall lace up moccasins.  Those flutter sleeves kind of gave a little bit of an allowance for this more traditional pattern and style to be more wild and free and less vintage housewife.  This dress could be worn over skinny jeans, bell bottoms, with flats or heels…and still be stunning.  It’s a total style chameleon!

And now, for the piece that stole my heart with its sweetness factor.  This little tunic dress is clearly handmade and just the cutest thing ever.  I put it over a vintage puffy sleeve top and used simple tall boots because I didn’t want anything to interfere with the adorable detailing on this dress.  Jewelry really would just detract from it, so I left it off.  I think this was my absolute favorite piece to style because of its uniqueness and it’s pretty accents and front pockets!

You guys need to check out this shop.

Danielle and Rebecca started The Reformed Moth five years ago, and their original intention was to upcycle vintage clothing.  They began finding pieces that were so good as they were, that they decided to not mess with perfection and sell them in their original state!  They are just like me…LOVE the thrill of the perfect vintage find at a flea market…those pieces that are wearable and on trend even though they were made long ago.  These girls have excellent standards and taste…you’ll see when you look through their shop.  They were named “Newport’s Best Kept Secret” in a local magazine…and once you take a look, you’ll see why!

Go shop!  Get 25% off with code statelyvelvet :)

I’m really grateful to these girls for giving me the chance to style some of their pieces.  I’m hooked!


On Technology and Disco Dressing

College was awesome.  I had so much fun in my classes because I genuinely loved learning stuff.  One of the funniest things however was watching these well educated college professors try to use technology.  It was just the most amusing thing ever to see them attempt to use laptops, projectors, and basically anything that had buttons…including outdated VCRs!  One teacher would always hook his laptop up to a projector at the start of every lecture.  He would begin his lesson, and inevitably would become long winded and leave the laptop alone for a while.  It didn’t take a genius to see that every time the laptop would go into sleep mode, it would disconnect from the projector and then we would spend the remainder of the class watching him jiggle cords and unplug and replug things in while we waited for the campus tech support to arrive.  When we explained to him what was going on, he looked at us as though we were speaking Chinese.  Another teacher would “show off” the amazing technology in one classroom at the start of each quarter.  I know this because I had to take two classes from him and I heard from other students that this was his norm.  This was not a technology course, but the first day of every season, he would give this grand display of how incredible the screens and the sound system were…and of course, midway through, something would stop working.  And then, the rest of the time was spent waiting for the super irritated tech guy who would be shaking his head and mumbling under his breath as he fixed whatever was wrong so that this unnecessary display of technological prowess could continue.

My absolute favorite of all stories however, is this one class I had where I had to use an Apple computer for the very first time in my life.  It was a journalism class about layout and design, so we used a lot of graphics programs to try and design magazine and newspaper pages complete with photos and headlines and all that jazz.  The teacher gave us very specific instructions that we were to bring a zip disc (at this point that’s completely laughable because I don’t think those even exist anymore) to save all of our work on at the end of every class.  So I did.  The first day we were getting to work on those brand new computers, I put in my zip disc and began my project.  When I was finished and ready to leave the lab, I wanted to take my zip disc out of the drive.  I looked around, and couldn’t find an eject button anywhere.  Not on the computer, not on the screen, there was nothing to be found.  I asked the teacher how to remove the disc, and he came over to me and looked at the screen.  “Click here, then here…then choose this…” and he trailed off and looked confused and then got distracted by something else, leaving my disc safely in the computer.  Then I asked the two people next to me with zero luck.  Finally, I began walking around the whole classroom, asking one person at a time what on earth I was supposed to do.  After I had asked nearly every person in my class, one girl told me that I had to select the zip icon, then drag it to the trash can on the screen.  My response to these ridiculous instructions were, “oh yeah, that was the next thing I was going to try IF I WAS A CRAZY PERSON.”  Because, WHAT?!?!  I’m a decently logical person with this kind of technology.  But I’m telling you, these computers were the WORST.  Every time I would click on the wrong spot, or do even the slightest thing too quickly, I would get what I refer to as “the whirling pinwheel of death” on the screen, that basically was the computer saying to me: “screw you, you’re about to lose all your work while I crash.”  My then boyfriend (now husband) worked on campus at the time, would get angry texts from me, basically that said: “if you ever want to see this computer alive again, you better come quickly, oh and bring me a giant cookie too.” He would come save my work and the computer as well, while my teacher stood there repeatedly telling people to “click here, then here, oh wait go back…no click here…”  pretty usefully if you ask me.  I had a decent amount of computer rage after this class needless to say.  The computer did survive the entire quarter and I married my boyfriend because he never forgot to bring a cookie.

The good news is, I survived, and with some hilarious memories of flustered teachers trying to play a VHS tape but not understanding how the basic mechanics of a tape machine worked…and I wondered what decade they were actually born in.  Because VHS, you guys.

I love this outfit because it’s both so retro and kind of so disco space age.  It’s fun, kind of crazy, and just kind of techno.  The top is vintage and thrifted, the bells are from Fearless + Flawed, and the cute little cactus is from Appendage & Bough.  Ah technology is fun isn’t it?  Sure makes for some great stories though!

Dear Apple, you almost made me into a Droid user.  Sincerely, the whirling pinwheel of death.